Til Death Do Us Part...

On Dec. 27th 2012 my grandpa, whom we called "Papa", slipped the surly bonds of earth to touch the face of God. After a battle with lung cancer that just recently was discovered in May he succumbed to the disease that tore through his body. I quote Ronald Reagan after the Challenger disaster to describe my Papa's persona: "He had that special grace - that special spirit that said, 'Give me a challenge and I'll meet it with joy.'"

Yep, Papa was one of a kind, always there for every sporting event, always quick to crack a joke and talk politics with anyone. He was a special man. As the preparations for his funeral and memorial service have been taking place I've gotten multiple chances of listening in on conversations about who this man was, but the greatest relationship that sticks out to me is the one he had with Nona, his wife.

My those two were two peas in a pod to say the least. My mom had always commented to me growing up that Nona and Papa had the best relationship she'd ever seen. They were always joking and needling each other and trying to get the other one all flustered so they could laugh it off later together. The funniest story I heard about them is one that Nona tells. It was the first time she ever met Papa and he walked straight up to her and said, "We're gonna get married." To which she responded with, "Get away from me, you crazy!" Yeah, I'd say they were solid from the beginning. But according to his promise, he wooed her and won her heart, and from that point on they were inseparable.

They say actions speak louder than words, and Papa was one who showed his love for his Nona. From the ridiculous to the mundane, Papa was one who always listened and was happy to oblige the wishes of his bride. I remember riding in the car with them and Papa had her country music blaring through the speakers while she hummed along and sang to the songs. Did he particularly like country music? Nah, he always switched it to talk radio as soon as he dropped her off at work, but the gesture of "I'm gonna do whatever you want because I love you" was there. You could see clearly that he had the biggest soft spot for his Nona.

When the time was drawing near this late December, Papa still had unfinished business. From hearing the conversations over the phone and visiting the day before he left us, Papa wasn't ready to die until the last moments. He didn't want to leave Nona. He had ingrained in him the duty to take care of her and he wasn't about to let death stand in his way. On the day of his passing, Papa fell asleep and the nurses told Nona that he probably wouldn't wake up. The minutes ticked by with Papa's raspy breathing becoming louder and louder. Suddenly he opened his eyes and looked straight at the wife of his youth. His breathing quieted and he calmed down. That's when she reassured him that she would be well taken care of and he had nothing to worry about. With that, he slipped into eternity.

This made me think of those vows taken at the altar by all couples at the onset of their new beginning together. "To love and to cherish, to have and to hold.....something something......til death do us part." Nowadays those words have little meaning with divorce rates high and men dumping one for another. What does this tell me? Marriage ain't easy. It isn't for the faint of heart. Judging by the amount of people these days busting out the backdoor, the notion of marriage maybe isn't as glitzy and glamorous as the fairy tales go. But I know it takes a real man to see it through. To actually do what he promised to do on his wedding day. Not many "boys who can shave" can say that (don't even deserve to be called "men").

Well, my friends, Papa can. He did what he promised to the end.

new years.

granted, this would be more timely had it been posted on new year's eve or january first but it is coming now so deal with it.
i haven't ever thought about new year's and the meaning or symbolism behind it but it struck me funny this year when there were so many ads surrounding resolutions and changing yourself for the new year.  i'm all for the exciting incident or incentive that a new calendar year may bring to one's life but i found myself so much more reflective than futuristic at the end of 2012 and dawn of 2013.  there is a saying that says hindsight is always 20/20 while looking forward is often less than that basically emphasizing the importance of reflection.  and besides the importance, think of the practicalness.  try as i may, i'll never predict the future.  James 4:13-15 seems pretty straight forward that we do not even know our next moments. if the fragility of life wasn't enough, we have the impending coming of the Kingdom.  so relish our past, our experiences, our failures and triumphs.  for 2013 is sure to hold them too, i just do not know if we need to plan them.